We, as a person are shaped by our experiences. In the journey of life, incidents happen which truly alter your outlook towards things. I too have had many such incidents in my life.
Not sure what has prompted me to share this personal stuff with the world, which only a handful know. Nevertheless, here it goes.
I have been an adherent fan of Jagjit Singh saab, mesmerized by his soulful voice ever since I was in 8th standard in school, must be around 13 years of age or so. The poetry is something I cherish and at times I do pen a few. Fact that a poet does not live within the bounds marked by the society, gives him wings to think and speak about things which are often left untouched by our regular mindset.
It was fag end of 1995, not even one year out of college and like any other guy I was trying to find my feet in this world where one needs to earn his living. The world has started its wheels for change, cable tv has just started a few years back. From the days of just one or two channels of Doordarshan, suddenly we had slew getting used to a bunch of them. In those days, on Zee Tv a prominent name, a series used to air named ‘SAILAAB’.
The title track of that serial was ‘Apni marzi se kahan apne safar ke hum hain’ composed by janab Talat Aziz and sung by Jagjit saab.
Like I mentioned, my college days had just come to an end and logically I should have channelized my efforts towards building my career yet I fell in love with a girl. Yes, madly in love…wait a minute, it happens you’ll say, yup!
As they say, time flies in happiness, it sure did. It was summer of 1996, mobile phones were very much introduced in India, I didn’t have it then. I used to have a pager, yeah quite extinct now.
So one fine evening, I received a page, having an SOS code from my girlfriend. I called and heard her sob, my heart sank, all sorts of thoughts flashed my mind. In her breaking voice, he told me, her father is going in the morning to see a guy whom he chosen as her would be groom. I told her not to panic and we shall do something. Her reply was, it’s over...somewhere she had given up.
After disconnecting the phone, I was clueless, had no idea what am I going to do next. Everything seemed gloomy, there were way too many issues to iron out and yes it does felt like everything is over.
Came back home and this serial had just started at its regular time. Like every other time, I was listening to ‘Apni marzi se kahan apne safar ke hum hain….Rukh hawaon ka jidhar ka udhar ke hum hain’ the title track.
I had tears, no shame in saying so. My mother, who has been my hero and biggest strength could make out, something is wrong. We discussed evening’s incident and she asked me, what do I want to do next?
अब यहाँ ज़िन्दगी के उस मोड़ पर मेरे सामने दो ही रास्ते थे...
या तो मैं यही मान लूँ के ये कहानी यहाँ ख़त्म या फिर अपनी ज़िन्दगी को हवाओं के रुख पर न छोड़, अपना नया सफर यहाँ से लिखने की कोशिश करूँ
मुझे नहीं पता था आगे क्या होगा, कामयाब रहूँगा या मुफ़्लिसी नसीब होगी पर ये बात तय थी कोशिश करे बगैर नहीं मानने वाला
For non-Hindi readers, simply put I had to act, either to give in, surrender against the winds and let my lifeboat sail away OR try put an engine in my lifeboat, kick start and make it a power boat.
I am so very glad, I chose the latter.
Next morning, I along with my mother knocked my girlfriend’s door at 0700 hrs. Met her parents and she was pleasantly shocked, to see us there.
Never she imagined, I could do something like this. I saw, in her eyes, I had won her all over again.
As they say, rest is history and that girl became my wife. We look back and smile on those moments. God has been kind to us, indeed.
Now, you must be thinking, why have I bored you with this non-market stuff.
Let me tell you what was the biggest takeaway for me as a person: I won’t ever give up without a serious try. I’ll play against the odds if I have to, without being concerned about the outcome. I’ll never be a SAIL BOAT but a POWER one.
Then let’s see, how far I travel, am sure God would be kind enough to put winds behind me.
Thanks for being patient reading a small part of my life.
Youtube link to beautiful: Apni Marzi Se Kahan Apne Safar
